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Congratulations! You’ve just been promoted to the rank of Resident Janitor™ in a glorious multi-floor concrete block full of... opportunities.
Your duties include:
Sweeping things that don’t want to be swept
Fixing leaks using only hope and duct tape
Plastering over problems, literally
Dealing with tenants and their very emotional pipes
Posting “official” notices written at 2 AM after your third energy drink (or whatever you found in the basement fridge)
But remember: you're not a machine. You work 8 to 4, and after that? Nothing exists. Not the rats. Not the broken lights. Not Mrs. Grumble on the 7th floor.
🧹 Cleaning – Sweep, mop, scrub. Or just look busy when someone’s watching.
🛠️ Repairs – Duct tape. Screwdriver. Random junk you found. It’ll hold. Probably.
📋 Task System – Get daily reports from tenants. Some are serious. Some... not so much.
🧠 Reputation & Progression – Do your job well and earn tips, tools, or passive-aggressive praise.
📈 Absurdity Meter – The more “creative” your fixes, the stranger the world gets. You’ve been warned.
🪑 Janitor HQ – Your cozy little maintenance room, complete with a chair, a desk, and nothing you actually need.
Find trash. Fix things. Ignore consequences.
You're underpaid, underappreciated, and slightly hungover — but hey, this building isn’t going to semi-maintain itself.
So grab your mop, roll up your sleeves (or don’t), and start your mildly heroic, semi-functional, chaos-filled janitor journey.